A Jewish Poem

Normally I keep the tone of this Blog, even when discussing something serious, lighthearted. I can’t do that this time. I’ve been holding in plenty of anxiety and frustration these last few weeks, something I alluded to last time, and now I have to release it for my own sanity. In looking for inspiration for doing so, I’ve cribbed from Anna Akana. Specifically, her video “6 Asian Women Have Been Murdered”. You’ll see where I’m going with this.

Here goes:

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I say that with anguish.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I say that with pain and frustration.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I say that not as a parrot of an ADL statistic, but as a Jew.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I can’t begin to state how much that worries me, how much that makes me afraid. I can’t begin to tell you how fearful I’ve been to wear a Kippah openly, be it at work or on a walk, lest I experience harassment.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. And with that, memories of past trauma flood back into the recesses of my mind. Memories of BDS rallies, and how it was uncomfortable being a Jew during Israel Apartheid Week. How the Hillel room in my alma mater’s student centre was stormed as angry protestors shouted profanity at the Jews inside. And how I sat through a BDS vote in my 5th year, listening to Jews defend themselves while being singled out as Hasbara props. I’m still bitter about that.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. And with that, memories of more recent trauma flood back into the recesses of my mind. Memories of Jeremy Corbyn’s Labour leadership in England, and how he brought the country’s Jew-hatred to the surface. How bigots popped up constantly in his shadow cabinet, only to be removed them under the pretence of “doing better”. How 84% of British Jewry was criticized for pointing out their concern, mentioning that “it’s not as bad as the Tories” despite that not being relevant. And how British Jewry was hand-waved for “whitewashing Palestinian rights”.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I can’t begin to tell you how many people have called me a bigot for being a Zionist, and stated that I invented my connection to Israel to justify evil. Why would I lie about that?

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I remember hearing about “the brainwashing of Jewish organizations to get youth passionate about Zionism”. I remember the claims about those kids who risked their safety and lives to visit Palestinians on Birthright, and all without telling anyone. It wasn’t on their own dime, so why were they upset about getting into trouble? Did they not know Palestinian-friendly Israel trips exist for anyone interested in them?

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I can’t even begin describing what people claim Jews in Israel do for power. How they bribe American politicians. How they vote in favour of Netanyahu’s policies, despite Israelis hating him more than everyone else. How they “use the Antisemitism card to justify apartheid”. And let’s not forget the “deep pockets” claim, ignoring how the four richest people in the world are gentiles!

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I remember BDS using the Palestinian cause to stamp stickers on Sabra hummus, a brand that isn’t even Israeli. I remember how they forced a SodaStream plant out of business, putting innocent Palestinians out of work, then complained that it wasn’t enough. And I remember how every time I pointed out Hamas’s abuses of Palestinians, I was “moving the goalposts”.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I’ve been accused of being a Christian Evangelist for criticizing the Democratic Socialists’ platform on Israel, among other labels. That shows how little people actually know me.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. The words used to describe me have been various and unflattering. I’ve been called a “Zionazi”, “IDF scum” and “a libcuck”. I’ve been told how I’m “pro-war” for recognizing that Israel has a military out of necessity, ignoring how torn I am on The IDF. I’ve been deemed a “racist” for mentioning the flaws in The BDS timeline of Israel, been yelled at for calling “from river to sea” a blood libel against Jews and a “whataboutism liar” for stating that there’s been a Jewish presence in Israel for millennia. I’ve had to request that Israel not be brought up in some circles, lest it make everyone angry.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. And it’s boiled over. Instagram posts have called Israelis “Nazis” and have deleted calls for unity. On Twitter, people invoked Hitler’s name and received plenty of praise, while Tweets calling peace have received vitriol and contempt. On TikTok, Holocaust survivors have seen comments like “Happy Holocaust” for wishing people Shabbat Shalom. How does this help anyone?

Antisemitism’s up 400%. In the past two weeks, two Jews in my community were attacked for being Jewish. In London, a Rabbi was run over by a car, while an innocent Jew was attacked by a bystander. In The US, a man was attacked in New York City by someone threatening to do it again, while Jews in LA and Boca Raton were shouted at on the streets. Synagogues have been spray-painted with Nazi graffiti, and Jewish stores have been vandalized. And when these incidents were addressed, people have either used Palestinians as leverage, or tokenized Jews to hand-wave it all as “Hasbara propaganda”.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. Yet news outlets and satirical commentators have laid the blame largely on one side, omitting context and ignoring the damage this causes. And when Jews have been attacked for it, they’ve denied accountability.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. And when Jews have shared their experiences, they’ve been gaslit.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. But it’s “only about Israel”.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. But it’s “only about anti-Zionism”.

Antisemitism’s up 400%. But it’s “not personal”. You think I’m that naïve? You really think I can’t tell when you don’t care? You think that when I hear “Jewish” and “white colonizer” in the same sentence, it doesn’t rile-up my non-Ashkenazi brothers and sisters? All of this has spillover, after all! Because Antisemitism’s up 400%.

And that worries me. It makes me afraid. It makes me realize that I can’t be one of you. You’re supposed to be my friends, my “allies”. So why am I scared of you?

Antisemitism’s up 400%. I’m done. I’m tired. I’m exhausted. You can say whatever you want, but I won’t be your punching bag. You’re good at pissing me off, and you deserve every bit of scorn for demanding I stand up for every injustice that isn’t my own.

Why? Because Antisemitism’s up 400%. That’s not okay. It shows you don’t care. And it shows that you’re great at detecting Antisemitism only when it isn’t yours. Do better.

I’ll end this with a note: there’s been a trend, in the past week, for Jews to replace their profiles with blue patches or squares. While I don’t agree with this, I recognize their frustration. If true equity’s to take place, if racism’s to be eradicated, then Jews must be respected. That includes listening to them when it’s uncomfortable. Because Antisemitism’s up 400%.

Never forget.

From Pokémon to Pokémon...

The past while has been incredibly tense for me personally. Without saying why, though I’m sure you know, I’ve been incredibly fearful for my safety. It’s been challenging. So what do I do when life is trying? Simple: I retreat into my hobbies.

I recently covered my thoughts on Pokémon Snap, its influence on me, and why it endures 22 years later. That legacy was actualized with New Pokémon Snap last month for the Switch. I was anxious to get it, but when I finally sat down with it, my thoughts became complicated. It’s only fair, therefore, to share them.

New Pokémon Snap follows an aspiring photographer who, with the help of Professor Mirror and his assistant Rita, sets out to photograph wild Pokémon in The Lentil Region. Like its predecessor, you traverse various courses and “shoot” Pokémon to be studied and evaluated. Unlike its predecessor, there’s a story about studying the island’s “Illumina Phenomenon”. This, in theory, makes the game more expansive. In practice, it does that…but it also needlessly pads the experience.

I think that’s what got lost with this sequel. It’s not like the original game couldn’t have had more content-it only had 63 Pokémon-but it more than compensated with its depth of world. Many of the Pokémon could be interacted with directly, and that influenced the photography. Some could even evolve into stronger Pokémon. This game still has some interactivity, but it’s more passive. You mainly rely on timing and tricky angles, which can be frustrating.

I wasn’t a fan of the levelling system either. The original game didn’t have level grinding or getting the same photos from different angles. This one has both, and progressing through the game becomes a chore sometimes. I wish these features were either streamlined, or cut, as I found them tedious. But I digress.

Another element I found lacking was the items. Like the original game, New Pokémon Snap has fruit you feed wild Pokémon to get photographs. The game also has the Poké Flute, a returning feature that’s under-utilized, and a mechanic that lets you speed up, but it’s missing the infamous Pester Balls. Those are, instead, replaced with Illumina Orbs that you obtain by photographing special plants for Professor Mirror to analyze. Unfortunately, save the “boss battles”, they mostly unnecessary.

Yet another disappointment is the “forked paths” system. Every now and then, a scan will reveal a secret path leading to hidden Pokémon. You can either stay on your current path, or choose the alternative. It’s neat in theory, but these paths aren’t that special. They only provide small detours, which is unfortunate given what could’ve been.

It’s not all bad! For one, the variety of Pokémon has increased significantly, with some appearing in the evening or at night. Some only appear once you’ve levelled up, rewarding you for tedious amounts of level-grinding. I also like the course variety, as well as the Illumina Spots where you “face-off” against special Pokémon for the perfect picture. And, of course, Professor Mirror’s a more forgiving analyst than Professor Oak, even if his grading makes less sense.

I feel bad for griping so much. The game has moments bordering on excellent! I also recognize that I’ll never be the 9 year-old kid from 1999, the kind who’d experience this game with fresh eyes. But I can’t lie. New Pokémon Snap is fun, but I prefer the N64 classic. Sorry.

Moving on, I decided to go for another Pokémon game: Pokémon Rumble. I had mixed feelings going into it again. On one hand, I still enjoy it, even after my third play-through. On the other hand, there’s a reason why each play-through was 6 years apart, as well as why I’ve never beaten it. Let’s discuss that.

Pokémon Rumble follows wind-up toys in their quest to become the best. You start with a measly Rattata, or a weakling. When you find a crack in the entrance to a local brawl and decide to enter, you realize you’re in over your head and immediately lose. From there, you have to go to different regions, fight enemy Pokémon and acquire allies, and all to inevitably attempt to try again. So…it’s the Pokémon version of a dungeon crawler, except with toys.

Surprisingly, the game’s a lot of fun! I remember downloading the demo in 2009, completing what I was allowed to (twice), and immediately purchasing the full experience. Which is good, because the game’s quite the package! In fact, it’s hard to put down once you start it. How about that?

The gameplay’s simple: you traverse 6 areas in a given Ranking, fight enemy Pokémon and make your way to the area boss. Most of the time, enemies vanish when defeated. But every-so-often, assuming you daze them first, they’ll collapse to the ground and become allies. Make sure to grab as many allies as possible, because they have unique abilities and attacks that can help you later on. And since you only have three lives per area, that shouldn’t be taken lightly.

Once you acquire a strong enough ally, you can access the Battle Royale. This is, basically, a battle to the finish, complete with “last man standing” rules and a stage boss (or stage bosses). It sounds hectic, as there are multiple enemies at once, but since beating opponents adds additional seconds to your clock, it’s wise to take on as many as possible. It’s easily the best, and hardest, part of each Ranking. It’s also stressful if you don’t plan accordingly.

The game follows the “rock-paper-scissors” formula of the main Pokémon entries: water douses fire, which torches grass. Grass absorbs water. Water gets zapped by electricity, which gets buried by earth and rocks. Both earth and rocks are weak to psychic abilities, which are, in turn, weak to dark abilities. And neutral attacks are always a lottery. Even outside of that, higher-level allies are more-effective against higher-level enemies. And outside of that, it’s important to strategize based on an attack’s “Star Power”, which ranges from 0 (doesn’t give damage) to 5 (gives incredible damage) for your Pokémon’s primary and secondary attacks.

Overall, Pokémon Rumble was a worthwhile revisit after 6 years. Between the chibi-esque designs of the Pokémon, the many secrets and the fun music, I started wondering why I’d given up before. Then the EX difficulty was unlocked, and I found myself in Battles that were tiered. Suddenly, past trauma resurfaced, and I decided to stop playing. But at least I enjoyed everything until then!

That’s really what Pokémon Rumble’s always been: fun, but to a point. Is it repetitive? A little. Is it rote? Yes. Is it possible that someone might find it too easy? Maybe. But it’s warranted a few sequels over the years, ones that’ve expanded on the gameplay mechanics. That alone is worth it, even if EX difficulty sucks!

Now then, time to reengage with reality…

My Top 15 Favourite Moments in WandaVision

I’ve made it no secret that I enjoyed WandaVision. It not only captures the essence of grieving, but it does it in an interesting way. Sure, not all of it’s perfect, but neither is The MCU. So it’s only fair to discuss it in an appropriate way: with a Top 15 list. Let’s do that.

(By the way, spoilers. If you haven’t seen it, I recommend watching WandaVision.)

15. Wanda searches for her kids

Beginning with a small bang, I chose a post-credits scene. While WandaVision has a few, the final one drives home what makes The MCU great: creating more questions while simultaneously answering a few. It’s worked for the franchise since 2008, and I don’t see it stopping. And why wouldn’t it? It’s effective teasing!

The scene begins with Wanda in a shack prepping tea or coffee (I’m not sure which). As she heads inside and walks over to the kettle, we’re greeted to another Wanda, dressed in her Scarlet Witch attire, flipping through a magic book. We wonder who the real Wanda is, what she’s doing and why. And judging by her sons calling for help, it’s safe to say that Billy and Tommy are alive. Fancy that.

I know this technically ruins the resolution of the final episode, since Wanda’s arc was learning to let go, but this is intriguing. On one hand, we have questions about Wanda’s presence of mind, as well as how her twins are alive. On the other hand, we know she’ll rescue them. It’s a cheap way to establish her teaming with Doctor Strange, but it’s still a cool moment that keeps everyone hooked. Also, Wanda looks dashing in her costume!

14. “Stop it!”

The first two episodes of WandaVision (and much of the third) aren’t anything special, hence why most of the moments won’t be from them. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy them, but their more traditional nature makes the show’s first third a little weak. Nevertheless, they have their moments, as well as occasional chuckles. They also have instances where the seeds of creepiness are planted, and this is apparent in Episode 1’s dinner scene. More-specifically, the climax of it, where Vision’s “boss” nearly chokes to death.

It begins innocently enough: after getting passive-aggressively grilled by the boss’s wife on Wanda and Vision’s marriage, a typical 50’s sitcom trope, Vision’s boss begins chocking on a hash brown. As his wife chides him to “stop it”, we know he’s not acting. Even the audience laughter stops, and the camera zooms in. All the while, the boss’s wife’s chiding turns into a subtle cry for help, which gets creepier when you realize Wanda has the final say. It’s tense and uncomfortable, even if Vision eventually saves him.

I especially like this moment for two reasons: first, as I said, it’s uncomfortable. Considering that Wanda’s made a sitcom bubble where all of Westview are her puppets, that the bubble is already bursting so early on, even if for only one moment, causes contemplation and introspection on the ethics of it all. And two, it’s not funny seeing a man nearly choke to death on food. I know he and his wife were badgering Vision and Wanda about children, but almost-murder’s not a trade-off. It makes the situation that much more alarming.

13. Wanda announces her pregnancy/“No!”

Building off of what I said about Episode 1, Episode 2 is also relatively-uninteresting. It has more narrative depth, at least by sitcom standards, but the “drunken talent show” shtick, while humorous, goes on for way too long. Additionally, the fake-outs of “Will Westview discover their secret or not?” don’t hit the bullseyes you’d expect, even if they’re on-the-nose. Still, there are two moments that make it worth your time. The first is when Wanda hears a weird voice on the radio, and for a split second the illusion is broken. The second comes at the end, as it keys you in that something is off.

Like the last entry, it begins innocently: after reminiscing on their talent show, Wanda and Vision realize they’re about to be parents. Before they can celebrate, a mysterious noise from outside interrupts them. As they investigate, they see a beekeeper emerge from the sewers. He turns to them, specifically Wanda, and we suspect that she’s hiding something. We never find out what that is, however, because she immediately utters “no” and rewinds time.

When I first saw this, I baffled and confused. I knew a little about the comics this was based on, but I didn’t expect Wanda to have this much agency. Seeing her rewind time was actually frightening. Not even the decision to turn the sitcom reality technicolour could make up for it. I see you, Wanda! You aren’t fooling me!

12. Darcy’s reintroduction

I have to be honest: I didn’t like Darcy in the Thor movies. Nothing against Kat Dennings as an actress, but she was always an unfunny snide-mouth. She also ate into the movies’ quality with her presence, such that I was waiting for her to either die, or leave. So when I watched Episode 4 and realized she was going to be in it, I dreaded the worst. Little did I know that the writers were aware, hence rectifying the problem. Darcy’s still a snide-mouth, but at least she’s useful now? And funny? If her reintroduction’s indication, I’d say so!

What makes her work is actually-competent writers sculpting her dialogue. When she’s introduced in the back of a truck, she asks intelligent questions about the other specialists. And when she doesn’t care for one of them showing attitude, she snipes him with a clever retort. Not to mention, her witticisms are actually funny. Seriously, listen to them yourself!

But what drives Darcy’s reinvented character home is that she’s actually useful. She does stuff! Relevant stuff! Of her own free-will! And she isn’t afraid to show up her male colleagues! I don’t know where this Darcy came from, but more please!

11. Hayward’s men turn on him

Right from his introduction, it was pretty clear that Kevin Hayward sucked. Whether it was his explanation of how Wanda created The Hex, or how he treated Wanda as a weapon, that Agent Wu, a mild-mannered individual, struggled to not speak ill of him spoke volumes. That Darcy had a perfect swipe for him strengthened that. So it wasn’t surprising that his most-satisfying comeuppance, aside from his actual comeuppance, came when Wanda threatened him. It was the only time she exited The Hex to do it, too.

Basically, Wanda witnesses Hayward’s drone hovering above her and her sons. Despite censoring everything, it’s clear that she’s not happy. This is confirmed when she leaves The Hex, tosses the drone at Hayward’s feet and gives him an ultimatum: leave her alone, or she kills him. To prove she means business, Wanda mind controls his snipers to turn on him, all but pulling the trigger. Smooth.

I know this is supposed to reinforce that Wanda’s “the antagonist”, but I think this is an effective role reversal. It not only shows how powerful Wanda is, it also creates tension and suspense. You originally think Wanda’s done for, but then you remember her power. And suddenly, on a dime, Wanda now has leverage. That she turns Hayward’s men on him briefly is a bonus.

10. Monica Rambeau reappears

While The Avengers: Infinity War and The Avengers: Endgame touched on the blip and the reverse blip, not much was known from the perspective of regular people. Spider-Man: Far From Home humorously poked fun, if only briefly, but the full weight of half the world suddenly re-materializing was never really felt. Fortunately, WandaVision does that. It gives us it in the opening of Episode 4, centring it in a hospital. And it shows that through the eyes of Monica Rambeau, who happens to be the daughter of Maria Rambeau.

The scene even begins by focusing in on the words that Captain Marvel said to Monica as a child, using them as the voiceover as Monica rematerializes. Everything then gets hectic as she witnesses the scramble of people panicking. As Monica searches frantically for her mother, we see people bump into each other, patients witness strangers appear without warning and the hospital staff trying to piece everything together. And then we get the big bombshell: Monica’s mother died three years prior from cancer. What’s worse, Monica had disappeared two years before that, having been a victim of Thanos’s blip.

This is heartbreaking, but it’s also clever. Not only does it show the trauma Thanos had created, it also establishes Monica as immediately sympathetic. This is someone who’d disappeared with the impression that her mother had recovered, only to return to find out that she’d died. What’s worse, she wasn’t able to say goodbye. This is supposed to parallel her aloneness with Wanda’s, but even on its own it’s effective. Which is important, as she’s supposed to be relatable.

9. Wanda VS Monica

Episode 7 is where everything starts falling apart. Wanda, who’s spent the last 6 episodes trying to keep everything together, is sinking into depression. Her grooming’s falling by the wayside, and she’s no longer able to keep composed. Perhaps the most telltale sign is her fight with Monica. If nothing else, this is where everything starts to come to a boil.

The battle is short and straightforward: Monica enters Wanda’s home. Wanda, having already not trusted Monica, yells at her to leave. When she begins explaining herself, Wanda then tries flinging her away for a second time. But that doesn’t work, so Wanda and Monica part. End fight.

Despite the shortness of it, two important details are noticeable. One, we witness Monica’s newly-acquired powers in action, having crossed through The Hex three times. And two, Wanda showing her powers in front of the neighbours shows her mental decay. Because while the previous episodes had her “hiding” her abilities, she’s now so far down the rabbit hole that she no longer cares. Then again, given what we find out about The Hex, perhaps the neighbours don’t care? Or maybe Wanda’s grip on them is loosening?

8. Wanda expands The Hex

Rewinding to the previous episode, this is when everything starts falling apart for Wanda. Her grip on Westview’s fading, the cracks in her reality are showing, Vision no longer trusts her and her supposed twin brother isn’t what he’s cracked up to be. What’s worse, there’s impending doom coming from outside The Hex. So, what does a woman who craves control do when she lacks it? Simple: she tries holding onto it.

That’s what this is about. After realizing that Vision’s trying to escape The Hex, she freezes time and expands The Hex. In doing so, she not only saves Vision from dying, but she also engulfs half of Hayward’s camp. She even sucks in Darcy, who’s been restrained to a military jeep, in the process. It’s a great moment with plenty of funny tidbits (military soldiers becoming clowns, anyone?), but it highlights how creepy this Hex experiment is. Because if it can be expanded, is anyone really safe?

No, and that’s the point. Wanda’s grief is so powerful that it’s consuming everything. Not to mention, she’s manipulating everything too. That last part is now obvious, and we see that she’s the one behind this mess. But why? What could she gain from holding an entire town hostage? Well…stay tuned.

7. Vision and Wanda’s argument

Episode 5 of WandaVision is where the show becomes great. For one, it features some of the best character moments, including a few with Billy and Tommy. And two, it has possibly the best end-twist of any episode, which I’ll be covering shortly. However, I have to go with the most-heated moment in the series. It’s been built up to for a while, and it’s the point of no return for Wanda and Vision. Their whole dynamic shifts afterward, and while it never comes to this level of aggressive again, it’s clear that something’s now irreparable until the finale.

After Wanda consoles her sons on the death of their dog, Vision confronts Wanda about a conversation he had with a supposed co-worker. As Wanda pretends to not hear Vision and the “credits” play, Vision gets more and more accusatory. Finally, when she’s brushed him off a few too many times, he screams and levitates in anger. Wanda follows him, trying to deescalate without giving in. It’s a brief moment of fear, giving off the impression that their argument will become violent.

While nothing comes of the squabble, it’s noteworthy because this is when Wanda’s hold on Vision starts loosening. It wouldn’t fully fall apart until the next episode, but we’re still left wondering if Vision and Wanda will separate. We’re also left wondering if this is the only curveball to Wanda’s reality. But we all know that it’s about to get worse. Speaking of which…

6. “They recast Pietro?!”

You knew I’d cover this eventually. I was actually debating putting this higher, since it threw everyone off in a pleasant way. I was even surprised, and I knew it’d happen beforehand because I didn’t watch the show immediately. But it gets knocked down a bit because the twist in Episode 9 left fans so divided that they’ve ruined my enjoyment somewhat. I still like this moment, but I digress.

Taking place right after Wanda and Vision’s argument, Wanda’s greeted to a ringing at the door. She tries convincing Vision that she didn’t orchestrate it, which he, obviously, doesn’t buy. But when Wanda opens the door to find someone who looks like her dead brother, except not really, everyone, including Vision, is confused. Even Darcy utters the now-infamous “They recast Pietro?!” line. And then the episode ends, giving everyone time to reflect on what’d transpired.

This is brilliant on multiple levels. Thematically, it makes sense that Wanda would be desperate enough to want to see Pietro again, keeping in-line with her grief. Narratively, it’s a perfect time to reintroduce Pietro. Business-wise, it makes sense given Evan Peters’ portrayal in the Fox-produced X-Men movies, which Disney now owns. But humorously, even if it leads to a dead-end, it’s funny seeing Pietro Maximoff return.

5. Wanda ejects “Geraldine” from The Hex

Now we officially return to the first third. Remember when I said that the first three episodes wouldn’t be covered extensively because they weren’t as interesting as the later ones? Episode 3 is probably the most exciting, but my point remains. It does, however, feature one of the best cliff-hangers, thanks to a line from “a side-character”. Let’s talk about that, shall we?

Episode 3’s pretty par for the course for Wanda and Vision, except with more happening. Wanda’s pregnant with rapidly growing twins, and the hijinks that ensue create some really neat and cute moments (including one of the show’s funniest jokes). When Wanda gives birth and confesses that she had a twin named Pietro, Geraldine casually name-drops Ultron and seals her fate. Wanda then responds by rejecting her from The Hex, which we see again in more detail in Episode 4. Yikes!

This is chilling to watch, but it’s also the first time we suspect that Wanda has more control over her world than we thought. It also clues us in that Geraldine, whose real name is Monica Rambeau, is also hiding something too, even if she “doesn’t know” what it is. In any other situation, it also would’ve made Wanda into a straight-up villainess, since we, initially, don’t even see what happened to Geraldine. And when we finally do? Well, it becomes even more unsettling!

4. The Ship of Theseus

Many people criticize the finale for copping out. They cite the fight between Wanda and Agatha, Pietro being a dead-end and White Vision as typical “MCU-isms”, stating that they detract from the story. I don’t agree (especially about Pietro), but the one area no one complains about is the confrontation between White Vision and Hex Vision in Westview’s library. Especially since it subverts expectations. I even did a PowerPoint presentation on it for a course. Because I’m a nerd.

Beginning like any fight, complete with destruction, Hex Vision and White Vision realize that they’re evenly matched. The two then decide to start talking about existentialist philosophy. More specifically, about The Ship of Theseus, where they conclude that they’re both the real Vision. Hex Vision then restores White Vision’s memories, and White Vision leaves. Problem solved.

There’s lot to discuss here, but this debate is the crux of Vision’s in-show arc. Additionally, not only is it in-character for Vision to be discussing metaphysics, even if the location’s on-the-nose, it highlights how memories outlive the physical. Besides, who’s the real Vision? The Vision based in memories, or the Vision that contains his remains? To quote the show, “Neither is the true ship…both are the true ship.”

3. Saying goodbye

Keeping with the themes of Wanda’s grief, the finale of WandaVision is a heartbreaker. It not only closes Wanda’s arc, allowing her to accept the loss of Vision, it also “makes right the wrongs”. And it’s sad. Yeah, I said it: a show about a witch and an android saying goodbye made me cry. Who says The MCU can’t be emotional?

Beginning with Wanda and Vision tucking their children into bed, we move to the TV room where it started. From here, Wanda and Vision have their final conversation as The Hex begins disintegrating. As the house starts reverting back to its original state, Vision mentions that he’s not good at saying goodbye, to which Wanda says that “[They’ll] say hello again”. And then Vision disappears for a third time, with Wanda willingly letting him go. Cue the emotional fireworks.

This moment cemented Wanda and Vision as The MCU’s best couple. I’d always liked the two of them, but their chemistry never had time to properly coalesce because of time restraints. WandaVision fixed that by making their relationship the focus and giving it breathing room, showing how affectionate they were for one-another. It makes sense, therefore, that their goodbye was touching. That it’s played over the grief leitmotif helps.

2. “It Was Agatha All Along!”

Right when we were introduced to Agnes the Nosey Neighbour, it was clear something was off about her. Why does she always pop in at the most-convenient times? How does she always know that Wanda needs help? And how come she always has the perfect remedies? That scoundrel couldn’t possibly be hiding something, right? Well…yes. And her reveal is part of the fun.

Following Wanda’s fight with Monica, she discovers that Billy and Tommy haven’t returned from their visit to Agnes. She goes to investigate, winds up a dungeon, and is immediately held hostage. Agnes then reveals herself to be Agatha Harkness, a witch who wants Wanda’s magic for herself. And then we get a musical montage of how “she was secretly pulling the strings”, including convincing an actor to play Wanda’s dead brother. Oh, and she killed Sparky too! What a demon she is!

I know that Agatha’s presence adds little to Wanda’s situation. I know that her motives aren’t well thought-out. And I know that, save for the final showdown, she isn’t all that important or interesting. But I don’t care, because her theme song slaps. It’s also the best one in the show, which is a bold statement considering the show’s awesome jingles.

1. Wanda creates The Hex

You were waiting for this, weren’t you? It’s the big reveal, and it changes the dynamic of the series. This is the moment that drives Wanda to do what she does in WandaVision. Forget her past in Sokovia, or her conversation with Vision following Pietro’s death. Forget even her experimentation by HYDRA, or her initial reencounter with Vision’s fragmented body. No, this is the emotional high-point! Bless it for that!

The entirety of Episode 8 involves Wanda reliving her trauma, all spearheaded by Agatha. In the final memory, the one Wanda states is too painful to relive, we see her drive to Westview to the spot where she and Vision were going to grow old in. As she starts crying, we see that all of her trauma has been too much to bear. Wanda snaps, constructs her own reality, takes Westview hostage and rebuilds Vision with her grief. Suddenly, all those hijinks make sense. And in a twisted way, Wanda becomes the victim.

The scene is also really sad. Between Wanda’s grief and the show’s two musical motifs playing in-tandem, we really feel for her. Was Wanda justified in her behaviour? Not really. But is she sympathetic? Yes, because she deserves a happy ending. This is the pinnacle of everything, and it’s why I love WandaVision.

*****

Well now, that was a fun, if not exhausting, list! In case anyone wondered why I omitted the commercials, it’s because none of them, save one, were exceptional. And with the theme songs, I picked the best one and talked about it.

Anyway, that about does it for me. See you next time!

Lamenting Star Wars

I didn’t experience Star Wars firsthand. By the time I was born, The Original Trilogy had finished for 7 years. I, therefore, came to it through osmosis, be it VHS tapes at my neighbour’s house, make-believe with friends, or commercials about Star Wars-related memorabilia. It wasn’t until a friend’s 9th birthday that I’d see a Star Wars movie in theatres, and it was the “wrong Star Wars”.

Essentially, my Star Wars experience was a Millennial one. And with that came the baggage associated with it. I had to listen to ridicule from classmates for liking “the awful Prequels”. I had to read my local newspaper’s fan-letters from children about how “icky” Padmé and Anakin’s romance was. Even as an adult, I had to hear diatribes online about how “George Lucas raped our childhood”, something that’s incredibly tone-deaf in hindsight. And I can’t imagine what actors like Jake Lloyd, Hayden Christensen and Ahmed Best had to endure for appearing in these movies!

So yes, my experience with Star Wars was disadvantaged. This was made worse by Star Wars fans being blatantly toxic and not hiding it. The discourse became so vitriolic that it actively made me despise the original films when I watched them as a teenager. That’s not fair, especially given their legitimate craft. Nor is it fair that that bitterness made it impossible to be honest, and even forced me to jump off the Star Wars bandwagon for years out of concern for my mental well-being.

Fast-forward to 2012, when Lucasfilm was purchased by Disney. It didn’t take long for the announcement of new films and shows to be made to the general public. I had mixed feelings about this: on one hand, this was a beloved property being handed over to a conglomerate. The possibility of it, therefore, becoming homogenized wasn’t zero. On the other hand, there wasn’t much lower to sink. The Prequels had already been so derided that the only way to go was up. And given the talent Disney secured, as well as early rumours and test footage being promising, it seemed like Star Wars was on its way to redemption.

Except…that’s not what happened. At least, not for diehards. In fairness, I’d gotten to the point where I no longer cared if people hated me for liking these movies-I was in my mid-20’s by then, and I had bigger concerns like employment. But even with the enjoyment I got from these movies, I still had to contend with new rounds of vitriol from fans who hadn’t progressed beyond their toxicity: one movie was “a lame rehash”. Another was “a complete ruination of a classic hero”. And the third was “a complete cop-out”.

I was ready to give up. I wasn’t ready to throw away Star Wars, because that’d have been dishonest, but I was discontent with staying in the fanbase. Being a Star Wars fan was all about negativity and anger. And I wanted nothing to do with that. I wanted off the Millennial Falcon.

My tipping point was multifaceted. For one, the fanbase was actively antagonistic to others, even to some of the cast members. It was tragic when Ahmed Best revealed he’d almost contemplated suicide over his role as Jar Jar Binks. The news of Jake Lloyd’s schizophrenia and eventual DUI was unsurprising, as was his refusal to talk about his experience as young Anakin Skywalker. Even Kelly Marie Tran’s harassment for playing Rose, to the point of almost quitting acting, made me feel like garbage. Did the detractors not understand that these were real people?

Two, the antagonism towards those who didn’t mind the movies was something else. Firstly, hating Star Wars lovers isn’t a personality trait. And secondly, why should it matter? Movies aren’t an objective experience. Someone liking a movie you don’t shouldn’t be an indictment of them. People are too multi-faceted for that.

And three, it’s petty to be that spiteful. It’s also missing the point of Star Wars. The franchise started as a science-fantasy commentary on The American Military Complex, with The Empire being an on-the-nose parallel to Nazi Germany. There’s a reason the baddies wear scary clothing, are called “Stormtroopers” and are led by a towering, angry man in a black suit and helmet. George Lucas, for all his flaws, was making a statement about war and the military. It’s in the title! And by being so hateful, you miss that.

As a side-note, it breaks my heart to see the fandom behaving like The Empire. It also breaks my heart to see them act high-and-mighty when legitimate criticism gets lobbed their way. Because Star Wars is a goofy franchise. The writing’s kitschy, the acting’s pretty bad and there are many dramatic moments that are so over-the-top that they end up being hilarious. If you want proof, re-watch the saga. The campy nature of these films isn’t subtle.

I appreciate the irony of me being angry about angry fans. It’s not lost on me. And I recognize that I’m also giving in to this toxicity. But I don’t care, because I do care. I care that a franchise has made a generation this nasty, and that it has real world ramifications. But mostly, I care because it doesn’t have to be this way.

A wise person once said that no one hates Star Wars more than Star Wars fans. I think this is accurate. Another wise person once reminded everyone that Star Wars is a franchise about space wizards intended for children. I think this is also accurate. Besides, Star Wars doesn’t belong to one individual or group. Like a game of Dungeons and Dragons, Star Wars is malleable enough to be added to over time. And that’s what makes it great, not if X movie’s better than Y movie.