Redesigning Princess Peach

Wheel of Controversy, turn, turn, turn! Which scandal’s next to learn?

It’s no secret that I’m mixed on The Super Mario Bros. Movie. On one hand, being a fan of the IP, I enjoy the call-backs and humour. On the other hand, being based a video game, it doesn’t fully-translate to a movie. Basically, I understand its critical reception. But I digress.

I mention this because it ties in with Princess Peach: Showtime!, which is slated for next year. I’m excited. I’ve liked Peach since Super Mario Bros. 2, and it’s a shame she hasn’t been playable in too many platformers. It’s also a shame that the previous game she was the solo lead in, Super Princess Peach, had her rely on her femininity in a stereotypical way. I mean, crying as a weapon? Seriously?!

This is why this title excites me. Yes, Peach bakes in it, which feels out of place, but she also investigates, is a ninja and sword fights. That’s pretty cool, and it’s nice having The Mushroom Kingdom’s stereotypical princess flex her combat skills. That she’s also an actress definitely helps. I’m more interested in this game than Super Mario Bros. Wonder and Super Mario RPG, and I’m sold on both!

With all of this praise, you wonder what’d be the problem. Well…it’s really silly, but the internet found something. See, Nintendo updated the box art, and some people weren’t happy. Never mind that it isn’t even out yet, hence it could change yet again, Peach’s facial expressions as both her neutral self and her ninja self are more assertive. No longer is she shown as stereotypical and glassy-eyed, she has a smirk now. Her hairline’s also changed.

As expected, segments of the online world lost their minds, with tons of people complaining. How dare Nintendo alter Peach’s smile? Why does she have to be angry? Why can’t those woke SJWs leave everything-I’m sorry, I can’t finish that last sentence sincerely. Let’s leave it at Peach’s redesign ruffling feathers for now.

I don’t get it. Yes, Princess Peach has a redesign. And yes, it looks similar to that of the Illumination movie. But no, I don’t think it’s an issue. If anything, I welcome it! I wish it’d been made earlier!

I’ve never understood why Princess Peach’s face looked stereotypically girly. I know she’s a princess, and that she’s feminine, but her eyes and lips have always looked fake. She’s always been an idea of a woman, as opposed to believable one. Think Disney’s CGI princess face, but worse. It’s creepy.

I like this redesign. Having nothing else on the box art updated makes it stick out, but it’s nice to have a Nintendo princess and be life-like. It’s been decades since Peach’s introduction, and she’s long-overdue for a redesign. Besides, it suits her. Who wouldn’t expect a fighter to have this face? She looks like she’s having fun!

There’s a longstanding issue of sexism with female protagonists. It’s something Barbie called attention to: women are expected to conform to unrealistic and contradictory expectations, and they’re criticized when they don’t meet them. We saw this with the “Princess Peach is a girlboss now!” nonsense when her movie portrayal was first shown, and we’re seeing it again with her video game redesign. It’s tiring.

Some people have even compared her redesign to Princess Daisy. Daisy, for those unaware, is spunky, a complete foil to Peach. I can see that somewhat, but I don’t agree that it fits this particular redesign. Daisy’s not only spunky, she’s unhinged. Like Luigi re: Mario, Daisy’s always been the erratic firecracker. Peach, in contrast, is restrained, and while she’s been more assertive lately, she’s never been off-the-walls like Daisy. Her new design doesn’t convince me of that.

What confuses me is that I never see this critique for Mario. Mario’s allowed emotions. He can be redesigned and reinterpreted to fit the current zeitgeist. He can be conventional, and he can be unhinged, sometimes simultaneously. But Peach? Peach isn’t allowed to deviate from the archetype she’s been fashioned into. God forbid!

Here’s where I wonder if the complaints about Peach’s redesign are less about tradition than control. Yes, the box art could’ve been better executed. I, personally, think she has lower bangs now to compensate for her eyes being awkward without them, and I wish her sword and baking personas were consistent with that. But that’s nitpicking, and-let’s be clear-it doesn’t matter in the long run. The gameplay does.

In the end, this is another dumb controversy that deserves to be buried. Remember, Princess Peach: Showtime! isn’t out yet. The game could be amazing, and it could be atrocious. We don’t really know enough to judge it yet. But if Peach’s redesigned face is enough to cause outrage for insecure internet personas, then we have little to worry about. Because what does it really say when the subject of controversy is whether or not a fictional princess is smirking while stabbing her enemies to death?