Mario's Galac2ic Adventure

I know what you’re thinking: “Didn’t you already write this Blog piece?” No, as this is about Super Mario Galaxy 2. I also tweaked the title. But since you’re already here, allow me to share with you how challenging video games are for me. I’ll use an example from this game. Here goes:

The objective was simple: obtain the Boulder Shroom, an item that turns Mario into a boulder, and roll along the narrow lanes to the gold-coloured Star. It sounded easy enough, but was it really? I was notorious for bad judgement when it came to depth perception, thanks to my Autism, and my reflexes suffered because of my tics. Factor in that this required exact timing, and it’d be a real test of character. Still, a game was a game.

With a deep breath and my attention focused on the screen, I gripped my Wiimote and Nunchuk, the plastic, remote-like controller and joystick attachment, and began.

It started off well. I grabbed the power-up, flicked my wrist and knocked down the platform to begin the trek. I then blitzed down the ramp. Everything was going fine…until I veered too sharply to one side and fell to the abyss. Mario’s scream, coupled with the infamous music cue, informed me that I’d died.

Okay, maybe I panicked and turned early. I wouldn’t make that mistake again though, right?

Attempt #2 put that to the test. As I grabbed the power-up once again, I felt my body tensing up. My focus narrowed, my brain telling me to get it right. I was concentrating so heavily on not missing the first turn that I forgot to jump over the upcoming chasm. Mario screamed yet again as he plummeted to his doom.

I groaned, having now wasted two attempts at this challenge.

Perhaps attempt #3 would do the trick? After all, events often happen in threes, with the final one breaking the curse. As I started yet again, I tried avoiding my previous mistakes. I even snagged the extra life as I jumped over an early gap. If I kept this up, I might win? Unfortunately, I swallowed those words as I failed to make the final jump to the goal, causing me, yet again, to plummet.

I began screaming internally. I’d almost made it! What happened? With my anxiety flaring up and my tics kicking in, I’d underestimated how easy this was. Concentrating would now be tedious with my tics acting up. What’s worse, I was sweating from nerves, which was making me itchy. But if I timed my tics and scratches properly, I could make it out in one shot.

Easier said than done! As anyone Tourette’s Syndrome will tell you, fighting tics makes them worse. I couldn’t suppress them, I had to compromise with them. That not only meant not ignoring them, but making sure to release them so they wouldn’t throw me off. And it was hard, as my frequent plummets to the abyss would remind me. The constant failures even made my tics, sweating and itches worse.

Come on, I said after a while, remember mindfulness. Don’t fight the anxiety, work with it. I tried doing that, but it wasn’t helping. I’d become so engrossed in the moment that stopping to breathe was hampering everything. Plus, my perception was off, and I was making mistakes more and more frequently. Even ones I hadn’t made prior, which was irritating me. Why was this game so punishing?

Before long, I’d missed enough jumps and turns to get a Game Over. So I started the objective from scratch, returning to where I’d had trouble. The game was now giving me the option of letting it help me, that silhouetted shadow of Rosalina standing there. It knew I sucked, and it wanted me to throw in the towel. But I wouldn’t let it, I’d persevere until I…I…I…

Not now, I’m trying to concentrate.

Great, I had urine building in my bladder. I have a strict no-bathroom policy during tasks, so I decided to suck it up and hope I didn’t wet myself. Besides, my failures were staring me right in the face. Life hated me right now.

Attempt #12. I’d missed the sharp turns at the end at least 4 times by now, 2 of them back-to-back.

Attempt #15. I forgot to jump before the extra life.

Attempt #20. My tics were at full-force, my itching at maximum. I felt my bladder filling up. And what’s worse, now I had an urge to crap too.

Attempt #24. I’d gotten my second Game Over because of a sneeze. I glanced at the clock on my TV’s digital box and realized I’d been at this for over an hour. It was almost dinner, and my stomach was growling. Lovely.

Attempt #25 was going to be the one. I’d beat this once and for all. I’d done everything right, and I was nearing the end…only to hear my mom’s reminder from upstairs that dinner was in 10 minutes. In that split-second where I responded, I lost focus and plummeted yet again. Dammit!

It took 5 more attempts to regain what I’d lost. This was it for real. I’d timed my jumps. I knew when to turn, when not to veer and when to stay the course. I even made it past the final jump and into the pen where the gold Star was waiting. All I needed was to jump up and-

-The dreaded notice that my Wiimote had run out of power popped up. And I didn’t have any AA batteries on hand. 30 tries, 29 failures, and 2 Game Overs, and for what? A dead Wiimote?

This is why I don’t drive a car.

In the end, all my persistence was for naught. The game was taunting me, and in the end it bested me. I’d return eventually, but for now I had to dart to the bathroom and eat dinner. That, and buy new batteries.

Lemme Twerk It!

I haven’t seen She-Hulk: Attorney at Law yet. I plan to, but I like waiting until Disney+ shows are almost finished before binging them. Anything I say about it, therefore, is based on hearsay and second-hand information. Besides, this piece will be less about the series than people’s reactions to it. In particular, it’ll be about one moment that’s garnered…unwanted attention?

She-Hulk isn’t new. She’s been around since 1980, when Stan Lee and John Buscema created a female variant of The Hulk who was Bruce Banner’s cousin. I don’t know much about her, since I’m not a big comics person, but I do know Jennifer Walters was given Banner’s blood in a transfusion. Since then, her gimmick has been that she’s The Hulk, but shorter, less-aggressive and with her cognition fully-intact. Make of that what you will.

The issue at hand here is a post-credits scene from the Disney+ show, where She-Hulk and her best-friend are twerking in her office. It’s short, silly and gained plenty of ire. In particular, it’s received backlash from people who think it’s “disgusting” and “offensive”. It’s as if, in their eyes, Marvel has “lost the plot”. And that’s “bad”.

I shouldn’t even be writing this. Not only is there real criticism with The MCU in general, some of which I’ve covered, but Marvel characters dancing isn’t new. Star-Lord danced in front of Ronan the Accuser in Guardians of the Galaxy. Baron Zemo, rather awkwardly, danced in a club in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. Even pre-MCU, Peter Parker danced in Spider-Man 3 during his symbiote phase. Dancing badly is an age-old phenomenon by now.

I’d ask the obvious “Why is She-Hulk twerking any different?”, but we know the answer. It’s why Captain Marvel being overpowered was a problem, why that moment in The Avengers: Endgame where the super-heroines helped Spider-Man was too, and why Ms. Marvel existing was most of all. It’s sexism. In other words, it’s okay for males to do this, but women? No!

I’m curious how small some peoples’ worlds are if this is a controversy. The MCU has real issues. Disney, the company that owns Marvel, has more. Like I said, I’ve covered some of those in the past. You’d think those issues would get traction, right? Nope! Instead, we’re discussing the “negative implications” of a female attorney shaking her booty. The world is so cruel…

It's annoying because She-Hulk, like her cousin, is comical. She even breaks the fourth-wall repeatedly, which, apparently, is a running joke in the show. Her twerking, therefore, isn’t such a stretch. Besides, isn’t dancing a pastime of youth? Or am I the oddball here?

Female characters in fiction are routinely subjected to a level of scrutiny that their male peers aren’t: Harley Quinn can’t be in a relationship with Poison Ivy because she’s subservient to The Joker, who’s abusive. Batgirl can’t be a relatable teenager because she plays second-fiddle to Batman. Even with Marvel, Captain Marvel and Ms. Marvel can’t compete with Captain America and Spider-Man because “that’s man’s stuff”. In short, women can’t be human beings.

It’s this kind of thinking that trickles down to reality. We’re seeing that with Roe V Wade’s overturning in The US: regardless of your stance on abortion, not giving women the option to have them is creating unwanted stresses. Women deserve better, and fiction also plays a role in how society operates, even if minuscule. It also shines a mirror on societal standards and expectations. But I’ve covered that too…

Besides, She-Hulk twerking, what I’ve seen, is cute. She’s having fun, and isn’t that what matters? And yes, she does point out earlier that she hates being catcalled. But that has no correlation with her dancing, especially in private. I think that distinction’s important, as unnecessary as it is to point out.

What’s the end-goal of this anyway? Is it to validate the frustrations of male nerds? Because it’s doing the opposite. Is it to make their voices heard? Because it’s doing that, but not how they want. Or is to quiet outsiders who are now interested in their hobby? Because that’s not working either.

I don’t think nerds realize how spoiled they’ve been recently. Their passions, once niche, are now taken seriously by everyone. With The MCU, I over-heard two women discussing The Avengers: Endgame on the bus a few years ago. Our interests are widespread now! Isn’t that what we wanted? Isn’t that good?

Because if so, that means we should embrace new fans, right? And that includes women, doesn’t it? And that includes women having fun too, right? So why is it offensive that She-Hulk twerks? Especially when Star-Lord and Zemo dancing were both seen as endearing? What’s with-oh right, sexism. Never mind!

I think critics of this moment need to grow up. If this moment bothers you, and it shouldn’t, so what? The show isn’t about She-Hulk twerking, right? There are other aspects that are more worthy of conversation, like if having a superhero law division is such a good idea. That’s what we should be discussing, not if a woman’s dancing “offends” you!

One Musical Scene: Remembering Laputa's Forgotten Robot Soldier

Music’s integral to the moviegoing experience. It not only enhances its energy, but when timed correctly it also helps set the mood. There are plenty of great composers out there, but my money is with frequent Hayao Miyazaki collaborator Joe Hisaishi. Hisaishi’s worked with Miyazaki since the mid-80’s, giving 10 of his 11 movies to-date a distinct sound. And while Hisaishi switched from electronica to orchestrations in the 90’s, it’s his controversial rescore of Castle in the Sky that I want to focus on. Specifically, I’d like to zone-in on one of my favourite tracks: The Forgotten Robot Soldier.

Two notes: one, there’ll be minor spoilers. I know the movie’s almost 40 years old, but I want to be fair. And two, this track deserves to be listened to on its own. So I’ll share it upfront:

Beautiful, isn’t it? (Courtesy of Chellon88.)

A lot of beauty exists in these almost-5 minutes of music. But it’s what they do in-conjunction with the scene they’re matched to that makes the difference. It plays right after our protagonists, Pazu and Sheeta, have landed on the floating island of Laputa. It’s strange that we spend a short time exploring before everything goes awry, but those precious few minutes are enhanced by the music itself. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

It begins as Pazu and Sheeta are greeted by a robot. The last time we saw one was when it caused destruction, so the calming melody eases the tension. It also highlights the innocence of the Laputian robots by having it remove The Crow’s Nest to reveal a bird’s nest. These robots aren’t inherently good or bad, they do what they’re programmed to do. Do I detect some of Miyazaki’s trademark character ambiguity?

With the nest saved, the robot requests that Pazu and Sheeta follow it to the garden. Which they do, and we get cuts of the wildlife going about their lives. We see tadpoles swimming in the pond, bugs flying and land mammals, particularly fox babies, scurrying along the grass. The music is somber, as if it’s sad that this once-prosperous kingdom’s now an empty forest. The question looms: what happened to Laputa?

We don’t get an answer right away, yet the music turns triumphant as Pazu and Sheeta wander into the garden. While it looks barren and empty at a passing glance, the ecosystem of Laputa’s really complex. So complex, in fact, that the opaque walls on the outside are fully-transparent and reminiscent of a greenhouse on the inside. Even with Laputa no longer having people, it’s still rich with life. It’s reminding the audience that nature doesn’t need humans, so we should be more respectful of it.

The music becomes haunting again as Pazu and Sheeta stumble upon another robot near a tombstone, this one motionless and covered in moss. Sheeta’s shocked, confirming that Laputa has been long-abandoned. The music then changes to somber as Sheeta’s offered a flower by the robot from earlier to place at the graveside, which she accepts and thanks it for. As she places it, she asks the question on everyone’s mind: what happened here, and is this the last robot? Again, we don’t get answers right away, but the feeling of isolation lingers. It’s as if this robot’s been forgotten?

And then, as if providing a bit of hope, we witness the foxes from earlier scamper up the robot and rest on its shoulder. It’s cute, but it brings closure to Sheeta’s concerns. Because while the robot might be “the last of its kind”, it has all the animals for company. That’s another lesson the movie imparts: you don’t need companionship solely from humans. Sometimes animals are enough. Think of all the pets people have in real-life…

As the music comes to its harrowingly-optimistic end, the movie zooms in on Sheeta wiping tears. She’s clearly moved by this encounter, and she’s not afraid to show it. I don’t blame her, as this is melancholic in its own right, displaying the beauty of isolation while reminding everyone of the loss tagged with it. It’s helped by the music, emphasizing the calm before the storm (in this case, an explosion caused by the military). It’s not exactly a long scene in general, but it’s effective.

Much has been made about whether or not this movie needed rescoring. One of the biggest points against it is that the movie had moments of musical silence to enhance the background noise, moments that are “ruined” by a Hollywood-esque score. While I can see that, I still think the orchestrations help anchor Castle in the Sky as a movie in the vein of Star Wars or Indiana Jones films. It has all the hallmarks of both, right down to the hokey storytelling, so why not? Especially if it gives us the aforementioned track?

Either way, this is the epitome of an orchestral stroke of brilliance. And it warrants itself as one musical scene!

A Pikmin Story

In 2017, I purchased a Wii U.

It seems foolish to do that. After all, Nintendo’s newest console, the Switch, was months from release. Why bother with a 5 year-old console, especially when it was about to be obsolete? Well, I’d heard good stuff from friends, and I was getting back into gaming then. I also didn’t know how to budget my spending yet, so why not? The least I could do was get the store clerk to lug the only available Wii U from the back shelf. Considering it’d been sitting there, doing nothing, for months, I guess I felt bad.

It feels weird saying that, as I don’t regret my purchase. I got a lot of milage out of my Wii U by sniffing out and scooping up Wii U games from bargain bins, schlepping them home and inserting them into the disc tray with the usual buzzing noise. Chief among these was Pikmin 3, which I’d happened upon while trading in an unwanted birthday present. One week later, and it was my favourite title on the console. That says a lot.

The Pikmin series follows the adventures of unwitting explorers who get stranded on the Earth-like PNF-404. In the first game, you take the role of Captain Olimar, a Hoctatian who has 30 days to gather his missing ship parts before dying. The sequel follows Olimar again as, together with Louie, he collects treasures to get their company out of debt. The third entry mixes up the formula by having three new explorers scavenge for fruit. In each game, you encounter loveable, plant-like creatures called Pikmin, who help you in your efforts.

If this sounds like an exploration series, it is. But it’s also an RTS, or Real-Time Strategy, series. Considering that RTS games were never something I was good at, that this one’s streamlined enough to be easily-accessible makes it a “baby’s first RTS” franchise. Not that I’m complaining, as it’s lots of fun (mostly)! And judging by its reception, I’m not exactly alone on that sentiment.

What makes the Pikmin games endearing? I think it boils down to their accessibility. You start each in-game “day”, which lasts roughly 20 minutes, by waking the Pikmin from their home, or Onion, and exploring your surroundings. You can build your army by harvesting nearby flowers, attack wildlife and harvest their corpses, or aim for the primary objective and collect the special items. If that doesn’t interest you, you can take in the beauty of your surroundings. Each map has locations that are as colourful as your little soldiers.

Perhaps the most-striking aspect of the Pikmin themselves is how varied they are. They share an ant-like hive-mind that makes them a force to be feared, and their character traits change depending on their colour. Red Pikmin are natural-born fighters that are resistant to fire, while Yellow Pikmin can jump high and are resistant to electricity. And Blue Pikmin can swim and are resistant to water attacks. Later entries would add the treasure-seeking and poisonous White Pikmin, the burly Purple Pikmin with the strength of 10, the rock-breaking Black Pikmin and the diminutive Pink Pikmin, who can fly. All of these add strategy and puzzle-solving, and that you can only have 100 on the playing field forces you to mix-and-match.

The Pikmin are also really cute. This makes their deaths and conquests even more brutal. I’m not kidding when I say that Pikmin and enemies don’t simply die, they shriek in agony as their souls ascend to the heavens. It’s pretty bleak to see play out, made worse by the realization that they died horribly. If it weren’t for that, I’d have more fun with my conquest. But perhaps that’s also grounding?

Speaking of enemies, the games are littered with various types. These range from grub-like enemies, to flying bugs, to even sea predators. And there are bosses and mini-bosses, both of which have unique themes, are terrifying and reveal the biggest rewards upon defeat. I always dread when I first encounter them, my heart beating erratically as I whittle down their health. But when I defeat them? Boy is it satisfying!

If the main game isn’t to your liking, the second and third entries also have multiplayer modes. Pikmin 2’s multiplayer mode specifically is the game’s highlight. Whether it’s collecting cherries or scattered marbles to bring back to your base, there’s never a shortage of competitions to be had. In some ways, it’s even be on-par with the Mario Kart, Mario Party and Smash Bros. franchises for friendship-testing moments. Trust me, I know!

Unfortunately, if the Pikmin franchise has a downside, aside from occasionally-oversensitive controls, it’s the day cycle. Like I said before, each in-game day lasts approximately 20 minutes, and, with the exception of the second game, they aren’t infinite. It’s because of that that I could never appreciate the original game, while Pikmin 3 made up for it by letting you collect rations. Still, I suppose that creates an additional level of strategy…

Is the Pikmin franchise worth it? It depends. If you enjoy torturing enemies, then yes. If you like collecting items, then also yes. But if you like exploring your surroundings, appreciate occasional puzzle-solving and strategizing, or are looking for something exciting, then I’d give it a try. It’s not always the easiest series, and it can sometimes be unforgiving, but as a Nintendo franchise that’s been routinely slept on, I’d say that it’s worth it. In the worst-case scenario, you won’t get into it like I did.

Now then, where’s Pikmin 4? It’s been 9 years, Nintendo!

HBO's Tapped Out

Oh dear…

So I wrote a piece a while back on Batgirl. In it, I mentioned my concerns and overall disdain for WB Discovery’s new CEO. Initially, a part of me wondered if I was being unfairly harsh. In hindsight, I might not have been critical enough. Because the situation’s gotten worse since then.

Warner Bros. was sold by AT&T with debt in the 10s of billions. David Zaslav, the CEO of the merged company, made it his mission to reverse that by eliminating any excessive financial expenses. That’s not a bad decision on paper, but it’s the execution that matters. And so far, that’s been less-than-pleasant.

We already know about Batgirl being written off before its release, but that’s not all. Zaslav’s also written off other projects, cancelled more and left several to shop around for other services for release. He’s also removed high-profile shows from HBO Max without warning, and even decided to not renew others. In mere weeks, HBO Max’s archives have begun looking increasingly barren, angering almost everyone. And to top it off, this decision has caused WB’s stock value to drop by almost $6 billion.

I understand the need to pinch pennies when finances are tight. I do it constantly, after all! But I’m not in charge of a corporate giant with a backlog that spans over a century. I’m also not being paid exorbitantly despite cutting down on spending. Zaslav isn’t some grunt making minimum wage on a daily basis, constantly making tough decisions so he can afford groceries, but an ultra-wealthy man swinging the axe at film history. His actions are negligent.

I wish I were joking. Zaslav’s seen pushback from his own employees, with different branches of WB Discovery openly, and sometimes bluntly, criticizing him. Many long-time creators are expressing frustration over not getting advanced notice. Going back to Batgirl for a second, one of the directors expressed frustration over not being able to access footage he’d worked on because it was deleted. Or was he blocked from access? It’s unclear.

There’ve been several responses from the fan community. Perhaps the most-frequent is resorting to piracy to preserve lost content. I can’t say I’m on-board, I’ve had issues with piracy in the past, but it’s a sympathetic concern. Because one of the issues I mentioned in an older piece on digital media is the lack of permanent ownership, and how you’re always subject to the will of the streamer. The situation with WB Discovery is evidence of that.

It's especially worrying because this erases film history. Warner Bros. has, like I said, decades content. Much of this content’s also critically-acclaimed and award-winning, and some is in The AFI. If Zaslav’s current trajectory’s indication, how much of that will disappear forever? And how much of the digital content won’t be accessible for future generations? It’s concerning as a film fan, and it should be equally so to everyone who enjoys entertainment in some form.

This is another instance of overreach of corporate power. Say what you will about Disney and their acquisition of 20th Century Fox, at least they’re somewhat utilizing the purchase. Conversely, say what you will about Netflix-I can go on forever-but they’re not erasing content in large numbers as a response to their recent loss in subscribers. Zaslav’s doing no one favours by axing shows and movies left-right-and-centre, though. And given that it’s not even resolving the studio’s debts, I’m unsure what his endgame is.

Which leads me to those DC fans who are defending these cuts because of Zack Snyder. Firstly, Zaslav doesn’t care about Snyder. And secondly, what makes you think he won’t come after The Snyderverse? Yes, The Flash is still getting a movie, despite the debacle involving Ezra Miller, but so what? You don’t think that if Zaslav cared about The Snyderverse he’d be announcing far more projects for it?

No one likes listening to upsetting truths about the film industry. Lord knows how depressing it is to write about, and I do that regularly! But it’s unavoidable when it comes to my passion for film, as not everything’s Sunshine and lollipops. I’d love for everything to be Sunshine and lollipops, it’d be a lot tastier, but business and money are often messy and irritating. This is yet another example.

So when people in the industry are openly voicing concerns about Zaslav, expressing fears that they could be next, it’s worth listening to them. That’s far more important than if your favourite movie’s going to make a comeback. We can’t all be that fortunate, remember? Besides, Zaslav’s model is akin to reality TV. He gave us shows like Honey Boo-Boo and 19 Kids and Counting while at TLC. This isn’t to disparage fans of either show, of which I know a few, but it’s worth pointing out.

Ultimately, this is an example of how bad management can make a bad situation worse. Yes, the Warner Bros. + Discovery merger had lots of debt saddled with it. And yes, it was inevitable that changes would need to be made, and not all of them popular. But cutting content left-right-and-centre isn’t the answer. Nor is not letting your employees know in advance so they have time to prepare. It’s a tragic situation that’s only going to get worse, which saddens me.

Nintendo Did WHAT?!

Like most people my age, I grew up with Nintendo. I was first exposed to an NES at the tender age of 3, and I’ve never looked back. Sure, I played other consoles too, a neighbour owned a Sega Genesis, but it was mostly Nintendo. I even stayed with them in the 2000’s, when it was no longer “cool”! Essentially, Nintendo is my jam. So it hurts whenever they do something bad.

Honestly, Nintendo’s done plenty that I can’t stand by. Their DRM nonsense is criminal, as is refusing to preserve older games. They’re also needlessly-strict on parental controls and region locking, and their internet support is lacking. They’re also lazy with rereleases, stocking them for a limited time with next-to no upgrades. But now there’s inappropriate behaviour to contend with too, something that, sadly, isn’t surprising considering past revelations.

In a piece from Kotaku, many female testers for Nintendo products, most of them anonymous, had described harassment and inappropriate advances from male colleagues. One of them even dubbed the environment “frat boy”, with privileges for male testers that weren’t available for their female counterparts. I’d discuss examples, but I don’t have the heart to recount them. You can read about them here, however...

The recurring pattern here, interestingly enough, was a convenient lack of corroboration by male workers. Kotaku, on multiple occasions, stated that they contacted the individuals at the forefront of these controversies, only to be met with silence. This even included NOA head Doug Bowser, a man outspoken about equity, yet unresponsive over concrete examples for improvement. That’s concerning, but not surprising. Because this behaviour isn’t new in corporate culture.

I’m honestly torn: on one hand, this is a problem. Sexual harassment’s rampant in many industries, with complaints regularly falling on deaf ears. This is doubly-so with freelance industries, like animation and game design. Having Nintendo, who are known outwardly for a family-friendly image, under the knife here is really disturbing, especially when they called out Activision-Blizzard for a similar issue. It’s hypocritical.

On the other hand, I’m not sure people appreciate how damaging this is. For one, people aren’t video game characters. And two, this isn’t an excuse to justify bad behaviour because “Nintendo”. It wasn’t right with Disney, it wasn’t right with Marvel, and it especially wasn’t right with Activision-Blizzard. If it wasn’t right with any of those companies, then for sure it isn’t right with Nintendo. That’s worth remembering.

It's especially worth remembering because people often treat these scandals like spectator sports: “My company’s not as toxic as yours! You’re getting what you deserve! Ditch the mediocre products they make, okay?” Not only is this childish, it undermines the real stakes involved. It also undervalues the victims, serving to foster toxic behaviour on a macrocosmic level. It needs to stop.

So what to do? Well, bringing this to light is an excellent first step. Like sunlight on a nasty plague, showing the face of awful helps bring awareness. But we need to go further than that if change is to happen. I think, and I know this gets thrown around a lot with no real weight, real attempts at institutional change need to happen. It’s the only way to stop these incidents from constantly recurring.

Additionally, people need to be more sensitive to workplace issues on a grander scale. Yes, Me Too is real. And yes, it’s done some good at shedding light on this problem. But there’s a long way to go before we can actually achieve true justice here. And it starts with not treating corporate harassment like a spectator sport.

I’d like to end with two points. The first is that I’m not advocating for a boycott of Nintendo products. That’s ridiculous, and it’s a disservice to the blood, sweat and tears these women have poured into the company’s games, consoles and accessories. I also don’t think that they’d want a boycott. Life’s too short to not enjoy these video games.

The second is that this should serve as yet another reminder that harassment culture is real. It doesn’t matter the source, it’s there in some capacity. And as long as everything continues the way it is now, chances are it’ll keep happening. That’s bad. And it’s never going to change that way.

So yes, this is frustrating as a Nintendo fan. Also, Mr. Bowser, if you’re reading this, and I don’t know if you are, please take this to heart. You say you want to fix the problem, and I see that you’re launching an investigation, but that’s only the beginning. You need to listen to future complaints and crack down on them immediately. And you need to start giving women their fair dues. But most-importantly, you need to make sure this doesn’t happen again. I’m not sure how, I don’t work in HR, but it has to happen. I’ll leave it up to you and your team of experts to figure this out…

An Intimate Situation

(Note: The following deals with heavy subject matter. Read at your own risk.)

Every-so-often, a Hollywood celebrity with little-to-no baggage says or does something that disappoints everyone. The most-recent is Sean Bean. Bean initially gained a reputation as a character actor who died in his films. This became so common that he eventually stated that he was no longer choosing such roles a few years ago. This not only killed a long-running internet joke, but it also made his job as an actor challenging. Because he started receiving fewer roles as a result.

And now he’s back in the spotlight, and not for a good reason. In an interview for The Sunday Times, Bean called attention to the TV spin-off of Snowpiercer and said the following about intimacy coordinators:

“Often the best work you do, where you're trying to push the boundaries, and the very nature of it is experimental, gets censored when TV companies or the advertisers say it's so much…[i]t's a nice scene, quite surreal, dream-like and abstract.”

An “intimacy coordinator” is a consultant dealing with sex scenes and romance in entertainment. Their job is to make sure the scene’s authentic and respectful. If that sounds weird, remember that: a. there are coordinators for all kinds of positions. And b. sex is really difficult to do well in film, and it’s been bungled frequently. But I’ve covered that before, so…

Anyway, even if he clarified that he wasn’t against intimacy coordinators, the damage was already done. He went viral, and several actresses, naturally, criticized him. Truthfully, I don’t blame them? Bean might’ve not meant malice, but that didn’t make him less out of line. And in an era of Me Too, it’s incredibly tone-deaf.

Hollywood has an iffy track-record with sex. I’m aware there are constraints during production, but many “romantic” moments in TV and film don’t pass the sniff test today. Nor would they pass the sniff test in the real world. There’s a reason the sex scene almost died out, only to resurge in recent years with the guidance of intimacy coordinators. Never mind that standards have also changed...

Let’s assume Bean wasn’t arguing in bad-faith. Let’s try that. He was off-colour, but not for a bad reason. Why’s this still an issue? For a few reasons:

Firstly, Sean Bean’s been acting for decades. He’s a character actor, after all. He’s done plenty of shady stuff in films, including-but not limited to-threatening someone under the influence of a corrupted ring and kissing a woman against her will. I know actors aren’t necessarily the characters they play, but you’d think he’d “know”, at least superficially, what’s inappropriate. Especially given some of Hollywood’s biggest shames, like the “casting couch”.

This leads me to my next point: film’s dark side. Hollywood has numerous scandals over misconduct, and I’m sure he knows some stories. Some he might even be under NDAs over, we don’t know! Bean’s been around long enough that he should be more sensitive.

Moving on, Bean’s also in a position of privilege. He’s white and male, and those are already unfair markers. I’m mentioning this specifically because expectations aren’t as high for white males in Hollywood. Look at how Ava DuVernay was treated over A Wrinkle In Time, especially compared to Selma. Meanwhile, Michael Bay had five attempts at Transformers movies before moving on, despite all of them being poorly-received. The double-standard exists.

It's noteworthy because, like it or not, Bean’s highly-unlikely to deal with being sexually assaulted/raped. It doesn’t mean it’s impossible, see Brendan Fraser, but it’s a factor. Because of this, Bean has a responsibility to be more careful. Especially given the stories women in Hollywood have shared. Blasting intimacy coordinators is an abuse of that responsibility.

Finally, Bean’s comments don’t exist in a vacuum anymore. I’d argue that they never did, but especially now. If he says something, people listen. And if what he says is inappropriate, people will remember. It might seem “unfair”, but that’s how the internet operates. I’ve seen it firsthand.

Even if Sean Bean meant no malice, his words were still hurtful. He’s also not free of consequence, warranted or not. It especially doesn’t preclude people from responding, as we’ve already seen. Because all of the above is true. This might not be enough to “de-platform” him, nor should it, but Bean should take the backlash to heart.

This should be a learning experience for everyone. We’ve all said or done stuff that was “inappropriate” or “disrespectful”. I know I’m guilty of that myself, and it’s dishonest to cover it up. But messing up or misspeaking, especially about something like sex, doesn’t mean we can’t learn from or fix our mistakes. Because we should.

I think this is a reminder that intimacy coordinating deserves respect. It’s a job, and jobs are often gruelling. This is especially true when working with other people, as humans are messy and imperfect. Also, if the job involves advising sexual behaviour, which is difficult, then perhaps listening’s in order. Especially when you’re not directly impacted.